I’ve been a runner for a long time.  But, I haven’t been a “real runner” for several years.  I had some bumps along my journey and training for the long races I used to do kind of got put on hold.  I was just too big a mess to handle it all.

With all of that behind me, I’ve started to feel like I might want to get into the long course triathlon game again, so have been starting to run more consistently. Now, in training for long-distance races, I’m used to really training.  I am used to paying attention to my pace, my times, strides, heart rate – all that stuff.  It’s hard for me to just go out for a leisurely run and not care about how I’m performing.

On one of my runs last week, I felt heavy.  I felt like my shoes were cement blocks.  I felt slow, I felt overweight, I felt old.  It was hot.  Hilly.  I hadn’t fueled myself properly that morning.  Ugh.  I felt awful.

As I ran, all I could focus on was how terribly heavy and out of shape I felt. I started down the rabbit hole of negative self-talk – I’m slow, I’m fat, I’m old.  I’m not the athlete I once was.  I’m not enough.

I’ve become pretty good at noticing my thoughts, so when I realized I was going town the rabbit hole, I took a minute to breathe.  Realizing it wasn’t all that helpful to dig further into the rabbit hole of “not enough”, I shifted my thoughts. Of course, on a hot day on a hilly course, I was going to feel like it was hard.   I still didn’t like the fact that it was hard, but I began to practice acceptance for where I was at in that moment.  

I do some of my best thinking on my morning runs, and as my feet pounded the pavement, I recognized a few steps I was taking to reframe my negative thinking.

I thought I’d share with you 5 steps that you can take to reframe a situation that feels very negative.  I hope this process helps you avoid the “rabbit hole”.

Acknowledge where you are might suck and that’s ok.

Acknowledge where you are at this point in time, right now. Acknowledge that the situation might suck and it’s ok to feel that way.
You’re going to end up in places you’re not happy to be some of the time.  It’s part of life, and it’s ok.  Acknowledge that, but move on.

Look for the gift in the situation

It’s difficult to find the good in a shitty situation, for sure.  But stay with me for a second.  I’ve had some real shit sandwiches served up to me over my lifetime, and looking back, I can always see something positive those situations led to.  Those tough times forced me to grow.  I acquired new skills and experiences that have been invaluable to me at times post-shit sandwich.  My point is, you might not be able to see the gift in your situation today, but know that it is there and hold on to that.  You are exactly where you are supposed to be. You are in this spot for a reason.

Practice self-care

This one is important.  
Be kind to yourself, be gentle with yourself.  

If something isn’t going your way, SLOW DOWN.  Feel your stress.  Feel your anxiety, sadness, anger, frustration or depression.  Know that it will get better. Take a bubble bath, pray, take a walk in nature… whatever calms and relaxes you, DO IT.  But above all,  be gentle on yourself.

Trust the process

When you look for the gift in your situation, and you can’t find it right away, turn to trust.  Trust that you are exactly where you are supposed to be.  Things work out.  It may seem like the world is against your every move, but I promise you, things work out if you trust the process.  They might not work out how you want them to work out, but someday you will most likely be able to look back and see that things make sense.  

Prepare yourself for next time 

Now that you’ve gone through the above steps, you can prepare yourself for the next time you find yourself in tough spot.  Yes, it will happen again at some point!

Being prepared helps take some of the disappointment out of a situation that doesn’t go as planned.  Instead of feeling like you’re losing control when your plan doesn’t go as you thought, you’re preparing yourself for acceptance of what is.  

Next time I run, I’m going to prepare myself that I might be slow, and it sucks, but I accept it.  The gift is that I am able to run – I have some injuries that are nagging, but I am able to spend the time thinking and taking care of myself, even if I’m not killing it with my performance.  Besides, what does it really matter if I run faster anyway?  I’m competing against myself, not anyone else.  And I am where I am.  The only way to the other side is through.

On my next run, I’ll practice self-care by being gentle on myself and telling myself that it’s ok to slow down.  I’m taking care of Achilles and my knee by not pushing too hard.  I’ll try to be in the moment and enjoy the fact that I can run. There are plenty of people that can’t.

I’ve trained systematically and methodically in the past… a lot.  So, I’m going to trust the process.  By telling myself it’s ok to slow down and take care of myself, I’m going to get stronger, and eventually faster.  

As for preparing myself for next time, tomorrow is my next running day, so I’m going to set an intention prior to my run.  My intention is to listen to my body and my heart rate.  Let those two pieces of data govern how I push.  

I’m going to go into my run with gratitude and come out of it with a feeling of accomplishment.

What do you think? How can you apply these steps to a tough situation in your life?
 I’d love to hear your comments below!