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On today’s show, I’m talking about relationships. Specifically, how a relationship is just the thoughts you have about another person and how choosing your thoughts intentionally can improve your relationships.
Bear with me.
For example, say you have a friend – let’s call her Gertrude. You think Gertrude is amazing. You are great friends, you have a blast together, and you can tell her your deepest, darkest secrets.
Your other friend – let’s call him Bobby. Bobby HATES Gertrude. You can’t understand why, because you think Gertrude is the greatest thing since sliced bread.
See? Gertrude is the same person – she doesn’t change at all whether you like her and Bobby hates her, or you decide one day that you don’t like Gertrude anymore.
Your relationship with Gertrude and Bobby’s relationship with Gertrude are different because you have different thoughts about Gertrude.
Relationships also get a little sticky because we have expectations for the other person in the relationship. A set of “rules” for how we expect the other person to behave in order for us to feel satisfied.
One of my favorite authors, Pema Chodron, says that clinging to the way we want things to be, or the way we think things are supposed to be (i.e. EXPECTATIONS), is what causes us pain and unhappiness.
What if we were to just throw this set of rules and the thoughts we have aside and focus on connecting with our partner? I bet you could improve your relationships!
Listen to this episode of Real, Brave, & Unstoppable to learn more about how our thoughts create the results in our relationships.
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